Tuesday, September 14, 2010

Amma's arrival

I feel like writing today. I don’t have anything to really say so I don’t know what this post is going to be about.

Sudarshan’s mom is coming from India today. She will be with us for the next four months or so. I am really excited! It will be nice to have someone else at home and it will be particularly nice for Sudarshan. Our house feels very empty at present!

My mom has always had her in-laws with her. For the first time in her life, she is now spending time alone with my dad. It is a little bit bizarre for her – and more than a bit bizarre for my grandmother (dad's mom)! The concept is so very novel to both of them! When my mom decided to go to Singapore to be with my dad, she said to me, "Your grandmother has lived without you guys and without your dad. She has never lived without me - I don't know if she will cope."

People don't live in extended families "these days". When I mentioned my mother-in-law’s arrival and duration of stay to people at work, the most common response I got is, “How are you going to cope?” A lot of people seem to feel like this is an invasion to our privacy or like someone else is entering our personal space. I guess we have all started living in our own little worlds and don’t exactly like letting others into it – even close family. I want my kids to grow up with their grandparents like Sudarshan and I grew up with ours...

I have probably said this before, to me, marriage is not between two people, but between two families. Marriage makes you a better person – it teaches you to adjust to other people’s ways and teaches you how to give unconditionally.

I have learnt that when I say “I am willing to change my ways and accept yours”, I am actually gaining a lot more than I am giving.

I know so many people who will disagree with the above. It is not exactly a “modern” concept, but it is one that sits well with my ideals and I guess my personality too.

My rant ends here.

“Only a life lived for others is worth living.” – A. Einstein.